I filled out a survey on MySpace where the first question was "What would you do if your crush showed up right now?"
my stepsister answered and referred to her boyfriend in Iraq. I answered based on my 2006 Burning Man crush. (Aries if you are reading this you are 2005- mmmm 2005....) My understanding is that to be a crush, it must be unrequited, or it moves int o something else- puppy love or what have you.
That would mean then, that people in relationships are MORE prone to crushes, not less- because if you follow that silly patriarchal conspiracy known as monogamy- as I attempted to do for too long- crushes stay unrequited.
my stepsister answered and referred to her boyfriend in Iraq. I answered based on my 2006 Burning Man crush. (Aries if you are reading this you are 2005- mmmm 2005....) My understanding is that to be a crush, it must be unrequited, or it moves int o something else- puppy love or what have you.
That would mean then, that people in relationships are MORE prone to crushes, not less- because if you follow that silly patriarchal conspiracy known as monogamy- as I attempted to do for too long- crushes stay unrequited.
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SF Bay Area
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Re: what is a crush?
Thu, January 10, 2008 - 11:32 PMI recently found that by talking to my crush about the crush I had, the whole thing has blossomed beyond crushness. Though I think that you can still have a crush on someone - no matter the relationship - if they still give you that fun anxious feeling when you see them, just being themselves, from across the room. The conspiracy of my monogamy was pretty matriarchal ;) -- I think it's the *triarchal thing that's the tricky part -- realy it might be an oligarchal conspiracy. But I digress ;) I guess that a post, requited crush is more of a fleeting crush-moment. -
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Re: what is a crush?
Fri, January 11, 2008 - 3:10 PMI decided that Monogamy was a patriarchal conspiracy a couple months ago when I was reading "Psychology Today" according tho the article, scientists can tell that humans are polyandrous because men and women are different sizes. But Polyandry is to women's advantage, not men's and that got me thinking about how this whole monogamous marriage concept was thought up by The Church, headed by men, and how every boyfriend I've ever had has wanted to be exclusive right on the first date, and how they say with swingers clubs that its always the men's idea, but the wives are the the ones who make the couple keep coming. I also thought about how the media has been dominated by men since its invention, so my theory is that men popularized the idea that women wanted exclusive relationships and men wanted lots of women, to make women think that they had a good thing when they were really giving up an evolutionary edge. The idea that women want exclusive relationships is cultural, not natural. Women only think they want exclusive relationships because that's what they have been told - by men.
Tell your wives! If you dare! -
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Re: what is a crush?
Fri, January 11, 2008 - 8:48 PMor, maybe some women want exclusivity, & some don't, & you're one of the ones that don't.
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Re: what is a crush?
Sat, January 12, 2008 - 12:30 AMThen there's the notion that for the survival of the species it's more advantageous for a male to mate as widely as possible and for the female to be as selective as possible. But now we're far from crushes and into gender biased evolutionary survival strategies. Poly sounds interesting but too much like team sports or politics - then again I might just be easily confused :) then again - I'm a middle aged white guy so I guess I am the patriarchy. Crap! when did that happen?!?!?! Well shit! there goes my credibility. I need a scotch - oh shit! there it goes again! -
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Re: what is a crush?
Sat, January 12, 2008 - 12:36 AMtheories theories everywhere
not a drop to drink -
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Re: what is a crush?
Sat, January 12, 2008 - 6:53 PMwell I finally got people posting on this tribe again!!
I don't care if people believe my crackpot theories or not. I'm going to confess I was trolling- just a little. I mean, I really believe that monogamy is a patriarchal conspiracy, but ask anybody, I'm certifiably crazy. Probably why so many of my crushes get scared off.
so what is a crush? -
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Re: what is a crush?
Sat, January 12, 2008 - 8:10 PMis that scotch still available? -
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Re: what is a crush?
Sun, January 13, 2008 - 1:12 AMI'm 43 and white - there's always scotch!! I've successfully drawn the line at golf or sansabelt slacks though.
What is a crush? Is there only one definition?
How's this for one possibility?
Someone with whom I am so consistently distracted by their desirability, that I find myself forgetting about what I was supposed to be doing at the time.
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